Careers in Jazz
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Jazz Classes, in Detail


Unlike the more highly trained and thoroughly moneyed Career Professionals, Survivalists typically bounce among unskilled jobs, taking them mainly out of desperation as their gigging income falls short.  More often than not this sets off a perpetual cycle of gigging, falling into debt, washing dishes or working at a music store to get back ahead, quitting to gig full-time again, then falling back into debt.  Few have the wisdom to leave the jazz world altogether; many are trombonists.

Artists in this group are envious of Gig Whores, who more successfully troll the depths of the music world for scraps.  They view Epiphytes with ambivalence, being reluctant to admit that they are separated from them only by a lack of talent.

Identifying Signs
  • Air of desperation
  • Bad teeth
  • Domino’s Pizza car-tops
Survival Techniques
  • Pyramid schemes
  • Selling cell phones and sunglasses in makeshift mall kiosks
  • Drug-dealing

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